Human Habits

Why is it that old habits are so hard to break? What about our genetics makes us so prone to want to stay set in our ways? These are the things that have been so heavy on my mind lately. My husband and I have set in our hearts to try our best to only be our best for years now. It started at an early time in our marriage. I often laugh and tell newlyweds that my first year of marriage was nothing but fighting and "the best kind of making up." HA! It's still funny to me. The serious set of real deal burdens to change our character came when our first baby started to grow into a bouncing toddler. It was a true wake up call when our sweet darlin' looked up at us and threw her first tantrum. I do believe any mama's first reaction to bad behavior is, "now where did she learn that from?" Then a gut-wrenching feeling comes across most times because the answer too often becomes, OH! NO! I do that. or I say that, or I react that way. So as fairly new parents we set out to change the way we talked, walked, and acted, but unfortunately old habits are hard to break. What is the statistic 31 times doing one thing and it forms a habit? I'm not sure how much I agree with that, but I do know that I have often looked back after trying so hard to set good habits and  thought wow! when did that become second nature? For an example my sweet Mama tried for my entire teenage life to get me to make my bed every morning. Yeah, not happening! Once I was married I had the sense of pride in my own home enough to realize how much neater it made our room look and one day when I was making my bed VOILA! habit was formed! So now we're back to this point in our life where we feel the slump that has happened over the last few months that has drawn us back to some old habits. Now please know that I'm not talking serious addictions or anything like beating our children or illegal actions. I'm talking raising our voice, letting out loud sighs of dissapointment at another family member, an occassional slamming door, and body language that all too well speaks for itself of our attitude. To some of you this all seems petty, right? But you see, we at the Daniels' residence really do want to do as God's word tells us. We truly want to, as a husband, love my wife as Christ loves the church (Eph. 5:25), as a wife, submit myself to my husband as head of the house (Eph 5:22), as parents, train our children to love God (Prov.22:6), and as a family, edify with our mouths and actions (Eph 5:29). It's not as simple as, well that's just life our husbands and kids will have to hear and see other people act that way. It's also not as simple as, well I can change but why should I if noone else in my house is. It is all about changing our actions and reactions because God loves us and wants us to. Think on this W.W.J.D? Remember how popular this was? It needs to come back in style in our lives not just on our tshirts. What would Jesus do? My husband recently preached a sermon on our ministry as Christians to children or youth. In Matthew 19 Jesus calls the children to Him even when all the disciples were turning them away. Jesus took the time to care for people, love others, talk kindly, teach, minister. I could go on and on about His example, but the thing is that when I think of some of the words I say, the attitude I have, the aggrevation I have when my kids just want a minute, or the attitude I have when my husband asks me a question, I can only hear in myself what Jesus would not do. It's time for change. Serious-real-made-into-a-lifestyle change. So here's what we have to do to change. 

#1. First and foremost PRAY! PRAY! PRAY! He already knows our heart's desires but it sure means alot for Him to hear it from us.

#2. Study what God word says we should be doing. Start in Ephesians 5 with some of the verses I gave before. 

#3. Think W.W.J.D. Nowadays it does seem so cliche' to say that but it's so very obvious that it's what we should've done in the first place. If Jesus would say it, if he would huff and puff over cleaning up a room, or raise His voice to a toddler who spills milk, go right ahead, but you and I both know that would never happen!

#4. If at first you don't succeed try and try again! Don't think that there weren't days of a messed up bed in my times of striving for a neat resting place, but that did not stop me from trying again the next day. How silly would it have been to say well, I did not make my bed today so why ever bother doing it again!?!

#5. Don't give up on yourself. Don't think that just because old habits are hard to break that it's not possible! Phillippians 4:13 says we can do ALL things through Christ. 

Let's pray. Father, help us to be women that set our hearts on being more like You. Help us to have a desire to serve our family, to only show them love and kindness, to edify and build up one another. May we one day be able to say that Your name was glorified because of the way we reacted to daily life was such an example to others. We love You and praise Your name and we know that "ALL things work together for good to those who love You" (Rom 8:28) Amen